This past week I got a phone call letting me know a friend of mine passed away. Even though he was Seventy-Four, a loss is a loss, especially when you didn’t see it coming. ​

The worst part for me personally was the Lost Goodbye.

When someone dies unexpectedly, you go back to your last interaction, what you said or didn’t say. What you did or didn’t do.  Life doesn’t afford us do-overs, but at the same token, regrets don’t accomplish a damn thing. Sadly, I lost my opportunity to say goodbye; I didn’t get to wish him fair winds and following seas.

My friend’s name was Doug King. And this is my Lost Goodbye.

Thirty years my senior, Doug was unlike most of my friends. To describe him in one word, I think the apt adjective for him would be boisterous. If Doug had something to say, anything to say for that matter, you heard him. He was loud, opinionated, and good heavens could he weave a good tale. He loved his wife, sons, and grandkids unconditionally; he often bragged on them as we sat in his office late in the afternoon and “chewed the fat.” His PC screen saver contained pictures of his grandkids, and countless images dotted his walls in various photo collages.

His business was two doors down from my office. Nearly three years ago, when I moved into my office space, Doug popped in to welcome “the new guy.” He saw the various flags from foreign countries hanging on my walls and asked if I served in the military. I told him no, but one of my closest friends was a member of 5th Group and brought me back a flag from every deployment. Doug then shared with me his own military experience as he served in the Army. As we spoke, he noticed my overflowing bookshelves. He asked about my reading tastes, and we discovered our literary tastes mirrored each other. As soon as I told him I wrote novels as well, it was off to the races. He wanted to know what I wrote, how I created my stories, and above all, when he could get a copy.

For a long time, I resisted giving him my latest novel, The Body Man. I’m not sure why actually; maybe my imposter syndrome kicked in, and he would think I didn’t match up to all the fantastic authors we frequently discussed: Clancy, Flynn, Ludlum, Baldacci, or Child? (PS. I know, I don’t)

Often we exchanged books. Doug would come into my office, and I’d give him one or two books from my collection at a time. He would always bring them back (often dropping them in my mail slot if I was out that day) and tell me later what he thought. Sometimes he’d inform me the book was crap, although rarely did he not finish a novel he borrowed. In the past year, I got him hooked on Jack Carr, CJ Box, Kyle Mills, and most recently, Daniel Silva. I couldn’t believe he hadn’t read Silva, the purest writer of his generation. Sadly, he didn’t get the chance to dig into many of Daniel’s works.

Finally, in November of 2020, I let go of my internal insecurities and emailed him a copy of The Body Man. I waited a few weeks for his thoughts, I asked a few times during those weeks, and he replied in a calm voice, “I’ll tell you what I think when I’m done, Eric.”

The day finally arrived, and he walked into my office. He said, “I’m damn proud of you, you wrote a solid book, and I’m sure it’ll be a success. I’ve read a lot of books in my time, and this book deserves to be published.” I knew him well enough to know he meant every word. I felt relieved.

At the end of February, I stopped by his office to tell him I had a book contract, not just for The Body Man but for two sequels. He smiled from ear to ear and said, “I knew you would; congratulations. I’ll buy the first copy, and I want it signed.” I told him (jokingly) I needed him to buy more than one, a box if he could; after all, it’s a competitive field, and every sale counts. He laughed and said he would.

Doug didn’t get the chance. I had already included him in my acknowledgments since he was an advanced reader and friend, but I knew this week I’d have to modify what I said on those pages. I’m sad he’s gone, but at the same time, I feel blessed to have known him for a few years.  God gives us many gifts in life, and I think one of the most treasured ones happens to be friendship. Friends come in various personalities/styles, even ages; often, they arrive when you least expect them and sometimes depart whether you want them to or not.

When you finish reading this, pick up your phone and call a friend. Maybe someone you haven’t spoken to in a while. Check-in with them. Trust me; you don’t want a Lost Goodbye.

Goodbye, Doug. Thanks for believing in me, thanks for being boisterous, and thanks for sharing our love of the written word.

Godspeed, my friend.  

     What is my reason? That’s easy; I’m meant to write. It wasn’t until my late thirties I figured this out. You might say I am a late bloomer, but that’s ok, I’d rather show up late to the party than not attend. Writing is a challenge, a craft no one will ever master, and I’ve learned over the years improvement takes focused discipline while progress often comes in small measures.
     Your reason might not be to write, but you do have a purpose. Take the time, search within, and figure out why you’re here. Nobody else can do this; it’s a responsibility for you alone.
     I had the pleasure in January to meet my favorite author, Brad Meltzer, and spend a few minutes with him after an event in Atlanta promoting his book with Josh Mensch titled The First Conspiracy. Brad knew of my struggle to break into the publishing world and gifted me with a simple phrase consisting of six words. “Don’t let anyone tell you no!” For me, this statement reinforced a long-held belief while at the same time encouraged an internal drive as I achieve my literary goals.
     You may not be a writer and breaking into the publishing world is not your reason. That’s ok since Brad’s advice stretches into every aspect of my life and should yours as well. Obstacles and interference are a part of life no matter what path we take, but it’s how we react to challenges that reveal what lies inside. It’s not only outside forces that try to dissuade us from our reason, more often nagging doubts comes from within.  
     A few pieces of advice as you pursue your reason:

• Surround yourself with encouraging people and distance yourself from those who discourage you.
• Nothing in life worth achieving comes without bruises and scrapes. Nothing.
• Follow your heart, not someone else’s. You alone will live with life’s decisions, and on that account, you need to be the one to make those choices.
• Rejection hurts, but success tastes sweeter when failure precedes victory.
• Own your choices and never apologize for doing what you know is right.
• Above all, speak up for yourself. There’s only one voice who can express your reason.

     Finding your reason and pouring your heart into the endeavor won’t be easy. But achieving it will give you deep satisfaction. Hopefully, that sense of achievement will not only satisfy you but will motivate others to discover their reason, as well.
 
 

1) I’m getting better than this “writing thing.” Yes, it’s a (highly) subjective statement, but I know what I crafted during 2018 was far superior to my prose in June 2014 when the journey officially began with my first novel Vengeance and these words:
"The cool tropical breeze blowing from the west felt heavenly late this afternoon as the setting sun beat down on Richard’s face.”
I have no doubts this scribes’ scribblings will be better during 2019 as I complete work on novel number five tentatively titled Breach of Trust. Plus, novel six is in the works.

2) Authors are truly amazing people. No. I’m not talking about myself, far from it. I’m referring to all the authors I’ve had the privilege to meet, learn from, and read during 2018. Writing is a lonely craft, it’s you, a blank pad and pen, or laptop, and an overactive imagination. That’s it. Whenever an occasion comes along to interact with fellow wordsmiths, I’m all in. Recently I’ve joined a local writer’s group to branch out and connect with writer’s in my area. Also, for the past two years, I’ve attended Thrillerfest in NYC and been blown away by the comradery and genuine relationships formed during the conference. Where else can you crack a joke with Lee Child (about how you’re taller and better looking than Tom Cruise – yes I seriously did that!) and get a wry British smile in response, or shake the hand of David Morrell? (He’s Rambo’s daddy for those who don’t know) This year I worked on the security team keeping an eye on George RR Martin. I was clueless as to how famous he was until I arrived. Let’s just say there’s success, and then there’s SUCCESS! Same word, two very different meanings. Many authors went out of their way to offer me support, encouragement, and advice this past year. The Body man is a better story thanks to their feedback. I’m humbled. Truly.

3) The devil takes many forms, for years my Achilles’ heel was television and movies. Sure, there’s nothing wrong with entertainment in moderation. In fact, we all need it, but in life, you’re always giving something away to get something in return. I remind myself every year my most precious commodity is time. Two years ago, I found a new distraction from my writing, social media. Again, nothing bad in and of itself, but the devil is always in the details. Time is the great thief and my smartphone, and the internet robs me of it far too often. Frequent “glances” at Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook cut down on my writing which delays realizing my dreams. 2018 taught me I need to spend less time on social media and more time doing what I was put on planet earth to do.

4) This year I interacted with several unpublished authors. The most common question was, “How do we make it in this business?” There’s a litany of answers to that question. In fact, there’s a whole industry in the form of books, podcasts, conferences, websites, etc. etc. etc. all touting how an author can graduate from being unpublished to published. I’ve gone down the same rabbit hole, learned much, and still have an immense amount of knowledge to acquire. But I think most of us make this way too complicated. My number one piece of advice is simply this: write. Research, reading, networking are all essential, but the number one thing you must do is put in the time and create prose day in and day out. Period. End of story. Well, when you do that the story actually begins …  

​What’s in store for 2019? I haven’t the foggiest. But what I can say is my experiences and lessons learned in 2018 will help craft better stories, lead to new adventures, and spur me to greater heights. Failure is merely a stepping stone to success, and there’s only one way to let failure take hold. When you give up. Never allow that to happen instead always push on. I hope you’ll strive to do your best in 2019 no matter what goals you’ve set. Remember, Life’s a Journey, Not a Destination.
 
Onward and Upward.

     NONE of us are guaranteed tomorrow. BIG SHOCK, right? But what if today really is our final day on earth? I think we can all agree there’s something (In fact, more than one thing) we would like to say to those we loved and left behind given the chance.
     I’ve thought about this for a while regarding my kids ages seven and eleven. What if I’m not there to give them advice one day? What would I tell them if I could? So, I’m writing letters to both my kids, one for each year. Just In Case.
     Starting on their twelfth birthday and continuing to their eighteenth there will be a letter for them to open handwritten by me. These letters will not just reinforce things I’ve taught them over the years but will express things I wanted to impart during that year of life. I’m starting with twelve because the teenage years are coming and if there is ever a time to offer advice it’s then. Who knows I might keep writing additional letters, but for now this is my starting point.
     Here’s the thing, I don't plan to miss a single birthday. Not 12, Not 15, Not 18. Heck, I fully intend to see them both turn 50! These letters won’t be a waste because I plan to read them to my kids on their actual birthday. But Just In Case …
     You can join me on this journey. What you write is up to you. If you have young kids, I encourage you to do this with me, Just In Case. Maybe your kids are grown? Great! But it’s never too late to do this. And if you don’t have kids, there's someone else you’re close with. Again, the idea is 100% flexible and can work for anyone willing to take the time and write a letter. All of us have knowledge to impart, and everyone has one last thing they would want to say. I encourage you to take the time and do it. The pathway of life is littered with regrets, don’t let these letters be one of yours.
     I've already started my letters, they begin like this: “Just in case I’m not here to tell you in person I want you to know I love you and I will ALWAYS love you. Even though I’m gone, my spirit remains and will be with you because part of me lives on inside of you...”
     The challenge is simple, join me and write some letters … Just In Case.
 

     First, write the best damn book possible. Period. There’s nothing more important as a writer who takes their craft seriously. If your novel isn’t the best possible story you can tell, re-write it and make it that way. Like the Mercedes commercial says, “The best or nothing at all.” 
     Second, write what you like. If you’re not passionate about it I can almost guarantee your readers won’t be either. Some authors decide to write for the market and try to create something that might sell. Don’t fall into that trap. Write the novel you want to read and believe your future audience will feel the same way.
     Third, learn about the publishing industry, both the traditional and self-publishing routes from the top to the bottom. No matter which path you take the market is changing and you’ll need to understand everything you can about the publishing world. It’s a complex web but there are great resources out there that can teach you how it works. Also, remember, this is a business and it’s not personal. If the publishing industry doesn’t feel like they can make money off your novel you won’t get that chance. 
     Fourth, embrace the suck. Say what? Know from the onset you’ll be rejected often and rejection sucks (no matter who you are). Nobody breaks into this business without having the door slammed in their face many, many times. If you don’t have it already you’ll need to grow a thicker skin. I haven’t met a single author that feels this is an easy business. It’s hard. Real hard. I’ve had an NYT Bestseller tell me if they knew how hard it was to make it as a professional writer they might not have even tried to submit their query years back. Accept the difficulty from the onset and dig in for the long haul. Getting an agent and a publishing deal is a slow and arduous process but you know who gets both? The authors that never quit.
     Fifth, keep learning and read as much as you can. You need to know what else is in the marketplace. Successful authors read the novels written by other successful authors. (and those not so successful)
     Sixth, get out of your house, coffee shop, bookstore or wherever you write and explore the greater world. You might have a powerful imagination but experiences are a writer’s inspiration for future stories. The feel of the chipped paint on a park bench, a sweet and enticing smell drifting into the morning air from a mom and pop bakery, heavy footfalls and random chatter as you sit back and people watch in a big city…  all these are needed to make your story authentic. Can you make it up? Sure. But why not experience it and tell the reader what you felt, smelt, or heard from your own memory bank.
     Seventh, there are lots of rules but don’t be afraid to break them from time to time. Google “writing rules” and start reading. It’s amazing how many do’s and don’ts you’ll find. The good news is you don’t have to follow all of them. The bad news is if you’re trying to get published you won’t be the one to decide which one you can or can’t break. The publisher calls the shots. Your editor will provide invaluable feedback, and when needed smack your hands if you break a cardinal rule. Of course, if you decide to self-publish then you’ll have the ultimate say so.  
     Eighth, you don’t need to become a subject matter expert but do need to research enough to know what you’re talking about. Readers will find any discrepancy and let you know about it. Sometimes in very direct and harsh terms. Don’t give them any more opportunities then they will already gleefully take.  
     Ninth, don’t be afraid to make stuff up. I mean come on you’re a writer after all, right?  But when your imagination goes into overdrive you better make sure what shows up on the paper is believable. Your creativity is the greatest tools you possess, but you need to convince the readers the “crap” you concoct and put on paper is in fact plausible. 
     And finally ...
     Tenth, enjoy the process. If writing is a chore or drudgery chances are you shouldn’t be doing it.
     Remember “Life’s a journey, not a destination.” As a writer, you’ll face struggles and obstacles that will keep you from the thing you should be doing … writing a great novel. Stay with your passion, dig deep and find the words to tell an amazing story. You are not only your greatest obstacle but your only one. If there’s a story in there that needs to come out, set it free.
     Keep writing.
     And that’s my two cents.
 

   Now, every 9/11 we look back. Many of us recall where we were and remember what the horrific events of that day felt like.
​   As for me, I felt fear. It was the fear of the unknown. Nobody knew those first few hours if the attacks were the start of something bigger or even a calm before the storm. The fear quickly gave way to anger. Later, that anger transitioned to resolve. Life changed that day. Not just for me but all of us. No day has ever been the same.
​   I grew up in Connecticut and spent a fair amount of time exploring New York City. Sporting events, Broadway shows, skating at Rockefeller Center, and multiple trips to the top of the Empire State Building are just a few of the things I’ve experienced. One thing I never did during my numerous visits was make it the top of the World Trade Center. Always figured I would one day, but never got the chance.

   This summer while in the city I felt the need to visit the site. I needed to see where the attacks took place with my own eyes. To be honest, I had mixed emotions when I arrived. Due to time constraints, I immediately took the One World observatory tour and rode the elevator 1,250 feet into the sky. The ride from ground level to the 102nd floor was worth the price of admission. As I walked around the observation level, the view of NYC was truly spectacular. Then I saw them. The footprints of building one and two. I had chills. Surrounded by such an amazing view of the city I was reminded what occurred at that spot. After time to reflect and soak in the experience, I made my way down to the street level.
​

   I stood there and watched the water as it moved towards the center of the memorials. Closing my eyes, I listened to the people gathered around the memorial. The sun warmed my skin, and the words Never Forget came to mind.
​   We, as a people, must never forget the events that took place on 9/11. Time passes, wounds heal, but the memories must never fade. We must remember the sacrifices made and those which continue to occur. Our response and the resolve provided hope in our future. America is at our best when we are united. I can’t speak for anyone else, but as for me I remember and I’ll Never Forget.

     But, the dates aren’t important, what really matters is what the founders created. Consider these words:
      “We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.”
     Today we take such words for granted, but at the time this was radical talk. Remember, over the course of world history people weren’t “free” in a sense we think of today. Rulers called the shots, and most of the time the government structure took the form of a monarchy. Not some paper tiger modern-day monarchy we may think of now. The rulers in those times (most of them) ruled with an iron fist. The common man had no right to proclaim they were entitled to life, liberty, or the pursuit of happiness. In most cases, your destiny was determined by the family you were born into and couldn’t be changed. Some may argue not much has changed, but I respectfully differ.
     What the founder’s proposed was nothing short of treason against King George III of England. A crime punishable by death. Remember, in the past Kings and Queens were ordained by God himself (So the people were told). You didn’t just ignore the will of God without dire consequences.
     However, the founders threw off the bonds of the British monarchy when they declared:
     “That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness.”
     Our freedom, yours and mine, is due to the bravery of these radical men. And yes, at the time their way of thinking was considered radical. They didn’t always agree, in fact, often they passionately debated and challenged each other regarding what would become the United States. Yet, they persisted, worked together, and hammered out a form of government that would sustain an entire nation. (Our current crop of politicians - members on both sides -  could learn something by studying history, learning from our founders) The ideas they proposed were considered crazy, fanatical, even suicidal. A great experiment that many expected to fail miserably.
     But, freedom was worth the cost. Risking everything they owned, including their very lives, was a justifiable loss if it meant those men and their progeny could live in a free world. Talk about bravery in the face of uncertain odds.
      How many of us would take those risks today?
    Times have changed, at least here in the states. Most of us (myself included) have become complacent. As long as we have a roof over our head, good paying jobs, food to eat, the internet, and entertainment at our finger tips (ect ect ect) we are willing to settle for life as it is, instead of what it could be. America is still the greatest (governmental) experiment ever conducted, but it will only remain so if We The People stay vigilante. Freedom can be fleeting and can be snatched away just as quickly as it was gained.
     Our foundering fathers gave us one of the greatest gifts we will ever receive … the precious gift of freedom. Let’s make a vow as a unified people not to squander that unique offering.
 
     Happy Birthday, America.